Two weeks ago I had an epiphany. For the previous month I had been dedicating several hours a day into seeking out a new job. I quit my last job because it sucked and everyday felt like the life inside of me was literally being zapped out of me. I moved cities and now find myself with the opportunity to find a new job that (in my fantasies) will finally fulfill my search for happiness, or at least one that didn’t have me counting the days until my death.
I had a job interview for a role that I felt offered more than what I’ve had in previous jobs. It was part-time, so I could spend more time with my daughter. It paid more. It offered more challenging work so I could definitely enhance my own skill set, and it was in a creative environment so I wouldn’t be constantly surrounded with the typical stressed out, elitist corporate types. I didn’t get the job.
I didn’t know whether I should be disappointed that I wasn’t ‘selected’ or relieved I didn’t have to return to ‘dread’. I told myself “If it isn’t meant to be then it isn’t meant to be. God has something greater in store for you”. But then I realised I didn’t actually want it. I only convinced myself that it would have been great because it offered more than the last job – but did that make it the job I actually wanted? When telling friends about the role it seemed like a great role but then I was focusing on the usual perks that make a job appear attractive to the ordinary job seeker. Of course I realise now that was my social conditioning at work again convincing me to choose something more ‘acceptable’ and ‘rational’. Having time to sit down and contemplate it, I realise what I truly want this job cannot offer. Freedom.
Freedom to work my own hours, freedom to take a break whenever I please, freedom to develop and contribute my own ideas whenever I please, freedom to set my own agenda and freedom to simply live the life I want. For me to look for a regular 9-5 job as I always have, working in an office, commuting for two hours a day, would be quite simply to turn my back on what I truly want. Freedom. I want a life! I want to live!
The weeks I’ve been unemployed I have been able to walk my daughter to school every morning and pick her up which I absolutely cherish. I’ve been able to read and research things I wouldn’t normally have time to do. I’ve been able to exercise regularly and relax every single day. Just to be clear, I am not a lazy person who sits around all day in front of the TV. This time has been an eye-opener because while I may be jobless, broke and homeless (living with relatives), I am free. I’m happy. No job I have ever had has allowed me similar freedom.
And now I have decided to invest in a home-based business. Of course I have no money whatsoever to start with and I have thought about this for the last three years. I don’t even know how to do this and what the outcome will be. But I am completely dedicated to this because this is the key role that will allow me to live my life as freely as I please and I do believe I’ve found the perfect home based business.
Life is too short and too precious. I have made a pact with myself that I will commit to this and do whatever it takes to reach my goals. Why should I continue to place my future and security in the hands of someone else who couldn’t care less about my happiness? There are people worldwide quitting the corporate world to work from home and pursue more fulfilling lives. I figure if they can do it, I can.
I love this article, “10 reasons you should never get a job” by Steve Pavlina. It sums up so many good reasons why I am making this decision and why I am finally breaking out of my cage and flying off to live my own life. And I will never have another job in my life. So goodbye to all you stuffy bosses working 60 hours a week – I don’t envy you at all.